Periwinkle Chronicles, tales of the citizens of Periwinkle [because all the other colors were already taken] County:
K9 Kapers
The Rev. Dr. Randall Nathan, (Retard), which is how they pronounce retired in Periwinkle County, or at least that’s what they tell him, was in his usual booth at Buddy Mutts Cafe, having borrowed Ernie the Barker from his grandchildren, Betsy and Johnny Kendy, since Buddy Mutts won’t let you in without a dog, with a copy of Michelle Bachman’s Facts About American History on the table in front of him, to keep anyone from sitting with him, lest he lose points in the Hermudgeon of the Year competition, hermudgeon being a conflation of hermit and curmudgeon, when Trooper Adam Wun came in, with Run Tin Can, his trooper dog, and slipped into the booth across from him.
Ernie, of course, barked, but when the German shepherd trooper dog gave him a haughty toss of the head and ignored him as insignificant, he went back to his roast-beef flavored cappuccino.
“How’s the dog sniffing training going?” asked Randall Nathan.
“Great, except for those old lady groupies who follow us around.”
“Why do they do that?”
“They want to see how the dogs find things, so they can teach their husbands to do the same thing to find all the things they lose.”
When you’ve been a pastor for fifty years, you know when someone wants a favor.
“Go ahead and ask it,” said Randall.
“Well, we’re having the field trials over at Sandwich Points, and I’d like for you to come.”
“Why in the world?”
“Well, it’s my turn to furnish the cadaver for the trials, and you come as close to qualifying as anybody I know.”
***
The similarity between the activities in Periwinkle County and events in other places is rarely coincidental.
[“Christ in Winter,” Reflections On Faith For People In The Winter Of Their Years, can be found at http://christinwinter.blogspot.com/]
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