Remington's Poem

Remington Watts, named for the painter, not the rifle, although most adults in Periwinkle County refer to him as "a son of a gun," son of Pastor Patty Niebuhr and Dan Watts, is a literary prodigy, reading far beyond his years. Since his 8th birthday conincided with the Spring Concert and Literary Fair at Raines School, Madame Rousseau thought it would be great for him to compose an original poem and read it to the assembly of students and parents and people who just like to come to Raines School because they always serve popped persimmons after each event.

Madame Rousseau teaches music at Volvo River High School, but Bok String, the principal at Raines, originator of The String Theory of Quantum Persimmons, persuaded her to take on the grade school event also.

Pastor Randall Nathan, (Retard), and Claire were in the front row with Pastor Patty and Dan. All were beaming as Madame Rousseau introduced Remington, with much praise for his advanced literary abilities. When he stood up, they realized that he had a soprano sax hanging on a lanyard around his neck. That was strange, since Remington does not play the sax. Remington didn't explain. He just stepped to the microphone and began:

The Perfect Note
by
Remington Watts

His notes were always slightly flat
Ulence was his name
in church surrounds or concert hall
his aim was still the same
to blow a note sublimely round
like no other earthly sound

[Like Randall Nathan, Remington has been reading the complete poems of Emily Dickinson, and this sounded Dickinsian, sort of. At least, Claire heard Randall humming "The Yellow Rose of Texas" along with Remington's words.]

A note from the bottom of his heart
a note from the end yet like a... start
his aim was lofty, his aim was high,
his aim was like no other guy
the hoi polloi are quickly spent
through anything that has a vent
but Ulence wanted a note to blow
that wore its own black tuxedo
a rider in the valley below
hangs his head over
to hear the wind blow

[At this point, Remington turned his beatific smile on Madame Rousseau, since the first graders would be up next to sing "Down in the Valley," but Madame Rousseau's eyes were big and getting bigger.]

in his search for the note that was perfect and round
he squatted 'til he almost touched the ground
he strained so hard he almost took a tumble
but felt deep in his soul a wondrous rumble
he blew the note so loud and hard
it silenced trains in the railroad yard
he received no applause from the Philistine hoarde
but perfection is its own reward.

The poet took a small bow. There was a moment of stunned silence, in which Pastor Patty's face turned persimmon puce. Then the crowd of students went wild. They were so loud that the persimmons started popping prematurely.

Randall Nathan turned to Claire and said, "We'd better hide him for a few days until this blows over." When he put air quotes around "blows," Claire kicked him in the shins.