A Literary Agent's Dog

Literary Super-Agent Phyllis Ethridge has a new dog.

No one in the publishing industry knows Phyllis has moved from NYC to Periwinkle County. She maintains an address in Sunnyside, which is as much a part of NYC as Tribeca or Harlem, but still has its own post office name. On her web site she notes that all correspondence, including manuscripts, must be sent electronically. Any mail to her Sunnyside address will be immediately recycled.

Her husband was a CIA agent. For reasons unknown, even to her, he left that agency in a hurry. He chose Periwinkle County as the one place in the whole world least likely to be visited by al-Qaeda representatives, and a certain woman who goes by Trixie. He now runs a coffee house in an old pig barn, "Good to the Last Slop." It's on a side street in Winkleblue, a hamlet of a few houses, a general store advertising "Live Bait and Fine Wines," and an antique store. Their old remodled farm house is located in the Winkleblue suburbs.

Too late, Phyllis learned that almost everyone in Periwinkle County is a writer.
She lives in mortal fear that local writers will learn that that she is an agent.

"That's a mighty fine lookin' dog you got there, Miz Ethridge," said Elmer Ungress, her persimmon gardener. "Looks kind of mean, though."

"It's a specially trained manuscript rejection dog," she said. "It can sniff out a MSW document of any length, electronic or print."

Just then a bleary-eyed slump-shouldered woman parked her rusting Volvo station wagon at the end of the drive and started up toward the house, eyeing the transom on the front door of the remodled farm house. The dog came to a point, its ears and tail pointed directly at the woman's crocodile purse.

"It doesn't meet our present needs," Phyllis Ethridge whispered to the dog.

The dog raced away toward the woman, snarling and snapping. She dashed back to her car, threw it into reverse, and left skid marks in the gravel.

"Wow, that was impressive," said Elmer. "What's its name?"

"Perrejlet."

"Per.. what?"

"Perrejlet. Emphasis on the 2nd syllable. It's short for Personal Rejection Letter."