Birthday Invites Are Not Required

David Balkum is the new young pastor at Forsythia Lutheran. He is a student at Discordia Lutheran Seminary in Capitol City. He comes down on the weekends. This week he has come a day early to get ready for Lent.

He called on both Fred and Herb Heltzog to tell them they are welcome at the Ash Wednesday service, but they cannot take communion because "if your brother has something against you," you cannot "come to the altar until you go, and make it right with your brother." [Matthew 5:23-24]

That united the brothers in at least one way: they both got very angry at the new young pastor. After all, they had been going to Forsythia for 20 years now, sitting on opposite sides, not speaking to each other there or anywhere else, and no previous pastor had ever brought up the idea of loving one's brother as a requirement for communion, or anything else.

Pastor Balkum tricked them into coming to yell at him at the same time. That made them even madder. They sat on opposite sides of his little office, with their backs turned to each other, arms folded across their chests. They looked like bookends of discord.

"Look," the young pastor said, "I don't like either one of you, but I'm still a Christian, because I love you. Loving doesn't mean touchy-feely stuff. It means hoping and praying for the best for the other person. I wouldn't invite either one of you to my birthday party, but every day I pray for you. I don't pray that you'll reconcile with each other, or that you'll be nicer so I won't feel bad about not liking you, or that you'll put as much in the plate as you tell the IRS you do. I just pray for you. 'Bless Fred and give him a good life,' I pray. 'Bless Herb and give him a good life,' I pray."

"He prays for me first," said Fred.

"That's because you need it more," said Herb.

"I wouldn't go to his birthday party even if he did invite me," said Fred.

"You certainly don't need to eat any more cake," said Herb.

Pastor Balkum was very pleased. He had won $5 from The Rev. Dr. Randall Nathan, (Retard). He had gotten Fred and Herb to speak to each other.