Sunday, August 29, 2010

Apocalypse Delayed 'til Next Year

Brother Bo Dacious, the “Apostle” at the “End Times and Gold Investment Church,” preached this morning on why the apocalypse has been delayed. He took his text from II Revelations, the source of most theology these days.

“We shall know the time of the coming of our Lord only by watching the standings of the Central Division of The National League,” he proclaimed, “for the Lord told the Cubs, ‘Don’t do anything until I get back.’ If they ever do anything, we’ll know the end is near.”

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